God saw himself. Finally, proof.

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What's worse than celery stuck between your teeth? A cruise ship stuck between your teeth.

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how many shit jokes do you need to make before you realize that random does not equal funny? TOO FUCKING MANY

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What did the black man say to the white man? Hey, I like your shirt.

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What is the difference between a goat? It can neither ride a bike.

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Who ever invented the "Knock- Knock jokes" should get a "No-bell prize"

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why did the boy drop his bus because he was hit by an ice cream

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Your mother is so stupid that she had to study, a lot.

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Roses are red violets are blue I fucked your mom now im about to fuck you to.

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two men are in a bathroom (note they are not in the same stall) the guy on the left says how are you and the guy on the right says hold on im pooping.

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What did john say to bob Hey bob

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Why couldn't Bob pick up his pen? Because a nuclear bomb just set off where he lives and it incinerated everything.

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Why was the girl crying? She got shot in the penis

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"Why is Barney green and purple?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way."

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I don't really like holocaust jokes because my grandpa was in it. Yeah he was drunk and fell off his guard tower.

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What do you do when you see an epileptic having a fit in the bath? Laugh at him

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What do you do when a black person steals your computer Inform the authorities, as theft is a felony.

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what did little johnny get his grandfather for christmas?nothing his grandfather died on thanksgiving

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A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

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How do you kill and red head? Throw your mom at them!

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A forty-year-old man forces a young child to strip down and take a shower. The child screams and cries, but the man persists angily. He then carries the child into his bed. The child pleads, "Help! Mom, make him stop!" The mother yells back, "Just listen to him. He's your father and it's past your bedtime." This is a common night-time routine for parents with their first child

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What did the Frog say to the other Frog? Nothing they can't speak

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A man buys some expensive lingerie for his wife on the occasion of their 10th wedding anniversary. After a lovely candlelight dinner at home, he tells her to close her eyes at which point he retrieves the gift box containing her anniversary present. Thoroughly exited, she rips open the box and takes out the beautiful garment, holding it up to the light in wide-eyed amazement. Her husband gives her a suggestive wink and says "would you like to join me in the bedroom to try it on?" To which she replies, "I AIN'T YER WHORE!"

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Why was a woman crying in a corner of a room She was raped

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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