Why did the boy die while brushing his teeth? The toothbrush wasn't water-proof.

thumb_up thumb_down

Roses are red Oranges are orange Nothing rhymes with orange Forever alone

thumb_up thumb_down

A Jew and a Neo-Nazi meet in a bar. They put aside their differences and enjoy a few rounds of drinks.

thumb_up thumb_down

What happened to the little girl who fell into the lake? She was rescued and made a complete recovery.

thumb_up thumb_down

How did the black man get a car? He bought it.

thumb_up thumb_down

A black and a white walk into a bar, d.r. King would be proud.

thumb_up thumb_down

I was not scared, I was disappointed, I was expecting to see you for you, not the whole strange outfit getup, what was the point of that? I know the deal about hypnosis and stuff, did you know it is actually known as monoideoism? But I really cant figure for the life of me how it is physically possible to be under a deep state of trance and completely awake at the same time.

thumb_up thumb_down

Do not use your phone, I repeat DO NOT USE YOUR PHONE, at this point we do not know enough, as for this kid, he is about two minutes from getting his ass locked in a nice prison, I told them he does not know anything, and I will make sure he does not squeal, you should be good, even if I got to take care of him.

thumb_up thumb_down

What time is it? 2:47 PM.

thumb_up thumb_down

what's the square root of pi? nothing. why would you add roots to pie, how gross.

thumb_up thumb_down

Diarrhea

thumb_up thumb_down

How much does a polar bear weigh? It depends, but most weigh around 775 to 1,200 pounds.

thumb_up thumb_down

My brother is crazy... crazy like a fox! I caught him eating a Possum on the side of the road yesterday.

thumb_up thumb_down

what's worse than finding 8 dead babies in 1 trash can?....... 1 dead baby in 8 trash cans.

thumb_up thumb_down

whats worse than the black death. Bieber Fever

thumb_up thumb_down

I am strangling you. Do you see my arms? I AM FREAKEN STRANGLING YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

thumb_up thumb_down

A man walks into a bar. Splash.

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you call an African man with no legs? Murderer

thumb_up thumb_down

How many infants does it take to paint a house? Forty-Seven.

thumb_up thumb_down

what is the difference between a black man and a white man? Their skin color.

thumb_up thumb_down

PATIENT: Doctor, doctor, I can't see my legs DOCTOR: That's because you're blind

thumb_up thumb_down

What happened to the old lady with a hat? She fell down

thumb_up thumb_down

What's black and white and red all over? An equality parade with a nearby homicide

thumb_up thumb_down

There are 2 muffins in an oven One of the muffins says to the other 'Jeez it's hot in here' Then the other muffin replied, 'OH MY GOD IT'S A FRICKEN TALKING MUFFIN!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops