Yo mama so fat, her Patronus is a cake.

Why can't Stevie Wonder read? Clearly the only answer is because he's blind

Doctor, doctor, I just swallowed a roll of film! That was an incredibly foolish and dangerous thing for you to do. I would be surprised if you survived another day before the chemicals corrode your stomach lining and release hydrofluoric acid throughout your body causing sepsis.

What do you call a black man driving a fire truck? A firefighter you racist.

What is the difference between a person of Mexican heritage and a park bench? One is a bench, the other is a human being.

why did the black man shoot himself? because he commited a crime and was sorry for what he had done

Whats as Heavy as a rock and also as light as a feather? Any object in space because the lack of gravity to give the object weight.

What did the shark say to the boat captain? So do you prefer cards or pool?

2 biggest lies I have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service and That baby dont look like me

Little boy: Daddy, daddy, I know what i want for Christmas! Dad: Oh really? and whats that? Little boy: I want a bicycle! Dad: Why my son? You are already on a wheelchair...

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

There are fewer coppers on sundays. As well as criminality.

Yo momma so fat shes eating right now

What's the difference between 31 dead hookers and a Lamborghini? One is a traumatizing tragedy that left at least 31 poor families mourning for their loved ones, whom were only trying to make a living in what is a terrible economy and were unable find a better job, and the other is an overpriced sports car.

Why did the racist guy die? Because the black guy stabbed him with a fork.

Why don't women have breasts? Because they have dandruff. Get it? Hint: "dandruff" = "dan druff"

Roses are red Violets are purple, and anyone who tells you otherwise is wrong.

How is a monkey like a bicycle? They can both climb trees. Except for the bicycle.

http://www.google.com/imgres?q=harry+styles+stupid&hl=en&safe=active&sa=X&biw=1022&bih=539&tbm=isch&prmd=imvnso&tbnid=eOr5o3kd5fIcpM:&imgrefurl=http://imgfave.com/search/be%2520stupid&docid=_B1z3__jBeF0wM&imgurl=http://27.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m1vrh3OhfK1r158a9o1_500.jpg&w=485&h=650&ei=Jo3HT-anK4To9ASrrp2KDw&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=104&vpy=105&dur=1249&hovh=260&hovw=194&tx=86&ty=138&sig=104463583013410208018&page=3&tbnh=162&tbnw=121&start=23&ndsp=16&ved=1t:429,r:10,s:23,i:149

2 Scientists walk into a bar. The first one asks for H20, and the second one asks for H20 too. They both enjoy a refreshing glass of water.

What is the difference between Julis Ceaser, and the moon? The moon is covered in rocks and craters, and Julis Ceaser is DEAD

"Roll back into the kitchen and imagine me a sandwich!" yelled the abusive husband to his paraplegic wife.

what is the worst thing to find out about for wife she is your arm

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have alzheimers. Cheese on toast.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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