What do you call a guy that just shit himself? Me

What building has the most stories? The Burj Khalifa.

What do you call a moldy apple? ... A moldy apple.

What's the different between a white guy and a black guy? The white guy makes his money, and the black guy steels the white guys money.

did you hear the joke about the vagina ....... you'll never get it

This is my fist. Would you politely run into it as fast as you can?

Holy sh** a talking muffin!!!

Why did the elephant cross the road? To run away from the angry chicken who was mad that he was slacking off work.

A man walks into a doctors office He has AIDS

What do you call a joke that is not funny? An un - funny joke.

Why couldn't the mentally retarded kid hear? It was too dark.

The stone said to tree I wanna be car the tree replied you cant be a car. Forever a stone

What falls down but never gets hurt? A professional stuntman wearing protective gear.

How many hours of sleep did Jimmy get last night? Zero, because he has insomnia. Jimmy got fired from his job today because of his lack of energy and motivation due to his disorder. His wife divorced Jimmy because he can no longer support her and their two kids.

why was six afraid of seven? because seven threatened to kill him and his family.

What do you call 10 black people swimming down a current? A happy family

An apple a day keeps the doctor away. Unless your father is a doctor and you live with him.

Your mum is SO fat... She died of a heart attack

Why did the puerto rican cross the road? To get back to his country, but then he realized there wasn't a road then fell in the ocean and drowned.

Why did the woman come out of the kitchen? She didn't.

Imagine that we take all of the elephants in the world and laid them out end to end in space Did you know all of the elephants would die Nature fact

why did Sally fall off of the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there?

Why did the aisian man get pulled over? Because he was going over the speed limit .

Twinkle twinke little star How I wonder what you are? Star: (Noun) A fixed luminous point in the night sky that is a large, remote incandescent body like the sun.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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