What's worst than the finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worst than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple. What's worst than finding two worms in your apple? Finding seven dead babies in a trash can. What's worst than that? Finding one dead baby in seven trash cans.

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What did the father say to his son, who incidently shot his brother while they were playing with a gun home alone? "It happens." He then hung himself.

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Doctor Doctor, I keep getting horrible boils all over my face! Okay then. Take off your underwear and we'll see what's going on.

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My dog has no dictionary. How does he spell terrible?

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What do you call a fly without wings? A rather unfortunate physical disability

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I was just thinking in something I swear ... I am still Just, wait, i'll be good

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What store adopted the dog ? The Pound

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Whats the difference between Sarah Palin and Jason Voorhees? Jason has a chainsaw.

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Will you please answer one question for me? "Yes" Thank you. -walk away-

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A man walked into a pub, and enjoys of a couple off pints. Some time later he loudly asks the gentleman next to him: Do you know about this thing called Fightclub?... The bartender had to call an ambulance, you don't talk about fightclub

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Hey, I just met you And this is crazy This song doesn't rhyme PENIS

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A woman gets home from bying tampons to use later in the month. She walks into the house and sees a heart box with a note from her husband of 5 years. The note reads: Roses are red - violets are blue - Fudge Is Sweet - Heres some Fudge...........She then puts the note down, eats the fudge, and has diarrhea a few hours later. The husband comes home and feels bad because he forgot that fudge upsets his wife's stomach. Later that night the wife asks her husband to have anal sex with her. The husband agrees but later regrets his action since his dick is now discolored and smells of shit..........Two days later the family dog dies. The wife and husband mourn. I like cheese

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why were maddie and maddy and rachel and jill all friends? we all enjoy pizza

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A women gets a call saying her only daughter is trapped inside a burning building. She runs as fast as she can too her car before she realizes... women can't drive due to their role in society, so she returned to the kitchen and continued to make her master's sandwhich.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Astyanax mexicanus, a subspecies of Mexican tetra that lives in a subterranean habitat and as such has structurally degenerate eyes that have atrophied over the course of evolution.

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No pen- no notes No notes- no study No study- no good grades No good grades- no diploma No diploma- no job No job- no money No money- no food No food- really skinny Really skinny- ugly Ugly- no wife No wife- no kids No kids- lonely Lonely- death No pen=death

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What is the difference between a car accident and being on your period? A period is less bloody.

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Roses are red Violets are blue ... Uhhhh I don't think anyone knows the rest of this!!!!!!

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What is the best anti joke? Dunno cant think of one

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Once upon a time there was a man that was exercising and he pulled a muscle and had to have his arm removed. The end.

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What do you get when you cross a lawn mower and a rabbit? A dead rabbit...

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What's worse than finding out your husbands gay...........finding out he's gay with your brother"

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I scream, you scream, we all scream when hit by an ice cream truck

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Why was the girl unhappy with her male teacher? Because he gave her a bad grade...and raped her the night before.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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