Q: How many times did the chicken cross the road? A: One and a half.

Did you hear the one about the dead guy? Apparently he was no longer living.

"bus driver pressed the horn at my mum and she stuck a finger up at him " Not the first time she's got the horn and shoved a finger up

Do Re Mi Fa So La Ti Only musicians will understand.

Why didn't the boy go to the bathroom? His mother was taking a well deserved bath.

Hitler walks in to pizza pizza, the manager asks how many? L

whats hard long and you put it in your mouth everyday a toothbrush

What is the most confusing day for chavs? Fathers day

How does Lady Gaga like her meat? As a dress.

Roses are yellow, violets are grey, I'm colorblind

What did the black man say tovtye chinese man? Hello sir how are you today?

What look likes a rocket, uses Mc Donalds wifi and takes off from Fairlawns Avenue Kevins House not instigating it was all Taggart

How many days can a pelican whisper? Pelicans can't whisper.

Angus is so Scottish he wears a kilt when it is socially appropriate.

Why was the black kid at school? Because he wanted to receive an education.

A naked man walks into a bar and is promptly arrested for indecent exposure.

Q: What is red and smells like blue paint? A: Green paint.

What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

When did the laughter finally die? When you started this joke.

Yo mamma so stupid... She's considering going to college to get a better education

Why did the accountant die?A terrorist put a bomb under his desk.

Romney: I think you would raise our debt and make more Americans jobless. Obama: It's just cuz I'm black!

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Suzie!

Why was the girl crying? She prolapsed.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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