How many cans does the average alcoholic drink in one night? None. Cans are solid and therefore cannot be drank.

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"I have a job perfromance review today!" Earl told his wife. "Good luck, I will make you a special dinner tonight," Melinda, his wife, responded.

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Why was the black family eating at K.F.C? The food there is really good and they had a discount on the family bucket.

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What do you call a joke that isn't funny? A joke that isn't funny.

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What's worse than finding the Holocaust in your apple? Nothing

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse replies, "My wife is dying of terminal brain cancer."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the stoplight turned green

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What do you call a black priest? Father, and then whatever his name happens to be.

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Why Didn't The Teenager Bring His Report Card Home to His Parents? Because He Was Murdered By Thugs Walking Home From School.

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So there is a white guy and a jewish guy walking, they find a penny on the ground who takes it? The white guy because he is in debt.

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What is rectangular, white and has two wheels? A limo getting its wheels replaced.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient ability. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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what do you get when a penguin has a heart atack pengatack

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is deceased, therefore rendering her incapable of movement, which is required to drive a vehicle.

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Why is my grandpa always so grumpy? Because he has diabetes and life is very difficult for him.

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One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. Everyone gathered in the bathroom to watch the fight. The challenger asks the opponent, "Hey whats that one thing you say when you let the other person win?" then the opponent says, "I give up?" The opponent yells, "I win!"

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What is worde then swallowing a slipper? Swallowing a granny to catch the slipper

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What's worse than anti-jokes? The holocaust.

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Three men stumble upon an ancient lamp in the desert. They sell it to a museum and split the profit evenly.

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Why are anti jokes not funny.... Because they make sense.

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What did the statue say to the other statue? stat-you?

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A man walks into a bar. He drinks heavily and dies of alcohol poisoning.

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Why couldn't Sally celebrate hollaween? Because she's not allowed to take candy from strangers. Also Sally died a week ago in a car crash.

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Why did the black guy get hit by a banana He was low on potassium and his friend threw the banana too hard

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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