What do you call a girl with ADD and too much free time? Me

What did the deaf, dumb, blind kid with two stump arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

"What the hell is wrong with you?" "..."

Found out the difference between onions and men. I don't cry when I'm chopping up men.

Yo Mama's so fat when she fell out of the tree she hit the ground very, very hard.

How do you drown a blonde? A: Drowing any person no matter the color of their hair is conpletely illegal and considered murder.

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What did the African get for dinner? Ebola Rice

Why'd the blonde jump out the window? To kill herself

Q: Whats the difference between a table and a Mexican? A: You tell me.

Whats worse than dropping your ice cream cone Your dad having brian cancer

Why did the joke feel paranoid? Because everyone kept laughing at him.

Q: What did the homeless man get on his Birthday? A: Hypothermia.

How do you make a baby be quiet when it is crying? slowly choke it to death

Q: Why could John say goodbye to his girlfriend ? A: He didnt have one

What's more sad then a dumpster full of dead babies? The live one at the bottom.

Every Good Boy Deserves Fibromyalgia

Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog.

Q. What is the worlds biggest lie A. I have read and agree to the terms of service ?

Ready for something funny? nothing

why did the supermodel have sex with the janitor? she loved him. and he was brad pitt.

WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

A duck walks into a bar. The bartender says what will it be? The duck replies "lemonade!"

What's worse than speaking to a Russian bear? Gettting mauled and eaten by one.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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