Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He has no legs.

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Q.If I have four apples and billy has 4 oranges, how many pancakes will fit on the roof. A. 3 because aliens like purple hats.

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What do you call a boy with no arms and no legs in the water? Bob What do you call that same kid when he's at your doorstep? Matt What do you call that same kid when he's hanging in your room? I don't know, but you should stop calling him names.

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69.

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What do you call a man with bananas in his ears? A doctor. He is clearly mentally unstable, and probably in pain.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house?!?! Neither has he

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? It depends on their painting skills.

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What is the best time to go to the dentist? When you have a toothache

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why did the chicken cross the road? it was suicidal.

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What did the orphan kids get for Christmas? Cancer.

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What is more disappointed the Lake Disappointment? You

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What do you get when you cross a hamster with a zebra? A genetic abomination that you should put out of it's misery.

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What do you call a black man with a peg leg? Disabled

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Who's the fastest kid in AA

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Whats included in over 90% of all car crashes? A Car

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Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? A) The color of their hair.

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Man 1: Do you want to hear a joke? Man 2: Sure. Man 1: Okay.

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What did jimmy say when his brother had been mean to him all day and he was about to get a straw and his brother took the last one? That was the last straw!

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What's the difference between 50 dead babies and a three-course meal? One of them can feed me for a day and the other is a three-course meal.

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When is a great time to eat chicken fingers? Never Chickens dont have fingers therefore making it misnamed and impossible to eat them

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Why did the little boy didn't finish his dinner? He died.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, shit is brown and so are you

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Who won the championship last year? There was no championship

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops