A elderly man was driving down the freeway when he got a call from his wife. He answered the phone and his wife said "Be careful dear, I just heard on the news that someone is driving the wrong way on the freeway." The wife then heard a loud crash over the phone as the drunk driver going the wrong way slammed head first into her husbands car, killing them both intstantly.

What is the definition of a shame (as in "that's a shame")? When a picnic is postponed due to rain, or hired entertainment becomes unavailable at the last minute due to illness, or a book ends badly having started out well.

Q. What did the dead man do after he died? A. Nothing. He's dead.

Why was Billy no mates? He had no friends.

I wondered why the piano was getting bigger. Then it hit me... I'm sorry I have visual agnosia

What do you call a cross between a dog and a bumblebee? One messed up lab experiment!

Roses are red Violets are blue Today is Valentines Day I am depressed

womens rights

Why did the editor lose his job at a poetry magazine? Because he's worthless.

My life is a dream in of itself.. inception???

A family walks into a talent agent's office. They do a cute family-friendly performance that they call "The Aristocrats."

What happens when you throw a blue rock into red water? It gets wet...

A monk went to a bar. He soon came out because he realized he didn't have cash because he left his wallet in his other robe.

A black man walks into a bar and he orders a margarita. The bartender says that the margaritas are exceptionally delicious in this bar. He was right.

Why did little Billy not eat all his carrots? He does not care about his vision.

When it comes ro the zodiac my grandmother was a cancer and... She ws killed by... A giant crab

This is a joke.

http://www.booksie.com/declan_mckimm

my egg roll

Knock knock, Who's there? Justin Bieber, LEAVE!

Knock, Knock Who's there? Bill Bill who? Bill your neighbor. Can I have some flour?

What's better than a stick? A stone

How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light-bulb? I'm melting!

What's black an blue and doesn't like sex? The 8year old in my trunk.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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