i think dylan is turnimg gay for amy

thumb_up thumb_down -19

I accidentally solicited a prostitute today. I was driving in an iffy neighborhood and saw a woman on the sidewalk, so I stopped to ask if she could give me directions. She must have misheard me.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

If Steve has 5 apples and gives Jenny 2, it is obvious they aren't eating oranges.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What made Qtip's so dangerous? Q-tip's music

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Can you spell iCup? I see you pee?

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Q- Why? A- Why not?

thumb_up thumb_down -19

So, a Vulcan walks into a bar... and he doesn't say anything, because Vulcan's suppress their emotions.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Jersey Shore.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

why can't hellen keller drive? Because she is visually impared and there for it would not be safe for her to drive

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What is red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

How do you get a baby to be quiet? Put it in the oven for a few minutes

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did the boy fall of the swing He had no arms

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What did the elephant say to the pelican? He didn't say anything. I lied.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

i had a dream last night;) it was sad because you lived but then i dreamed up a bus and made it hit you. i had a dream last night;) you died

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did the man crossed the busy road? Because he was sick of life.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did John suck at sports? He was mentally retarded and had no friends.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why was 7 afraid of 8? Because 8 knifed 10.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What did Justin beiber get for Christmas? A dildo.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

too bad about that wild ball, you otherwise played a fantastic softball game

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why does Shelby Like Pandora? Because she prefers rap and hip hop music and Pandora helps select songs for her to listen to according to her interests.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

I walk up in the morning feeling like pdidy who's pdidy grab my glasses out the door I have no glasses girl going to hit the city how do I hit the city ugh this confersasion is over song hmmff

thumb_up thumb_down -19

How big does your mouth have to be to eat a baby? How would i know, i'm not a canible.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." The man of the house subsequently notifies his government that genetic engineering is going awry.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops