A Jew, a Catholic, and an Aeithiest walk into a bar. The bartender look at them and says "Is this some kind of a joke?".

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How can you tell if a duck is quaking? Hear it

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What's the opposite of white? Black. You're racist. You fapped.

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How do you know when an Asian has robbed your house? You have informed the police, who in turn searched the house for DNA evidence, eventually leading them to the criminal, who just so happened to be a troubled Asian teenager attempting to join a local gang.

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Q: Why is six afraid of seven? A: Why??? Q: Idk, thats why I asked

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What did the bartender say to the upset horse? GET OUT OF MY BAR!!!

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why was the woman silent? she lost the ability to speak in a tragic boating accident in which her vocals chords were damaged thus making it incapable for her to utter anything

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? names

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How do you kill someone? Shoot them. How do you kill someone with a knife? Shoot them How do you kill someone in a car? Shoot them How do you kill someone in a jet? Put the gun in the propeller

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why does osama bin ladens death make me happy? because he was the leader of alkida and created many threats to the u.s. thus the death is ending this creating more freedom. (OSAMA LIKES PENIS!!)

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Why did the boy fall of his BMX? Because someone threw a dish-washer at him.

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Q Whats Yellow, Has a body, And has a Spiky head ? A a pineapple

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read me write me

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A Jew, an Irishman and a Russian walk into the bar and the bartender says, "Get the Hell out."

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Every Good Boy Deserves Fibromyalgia

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What did Little Tommy get for chirstmas? An explanation that Santa is a lie.

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If you have 12 apples and I have 12 ice cubes how many pancakes fit on a roof? Purple because aliens don't wear hats.

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What's worse than speaking to a Russian bear? Gettting mauled and eaten by one.

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Why did the man laugh as he sat in the electric chair? He was being tickled by the guard.

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Ready for something funny? nothing

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

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Cliterus

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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