There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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how do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The fridge is on its side, the door is torn off, and the ruined food scattered all over the floor. Not to mention there is an elephant in your kitchen.

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Whats green and has wheels? Grass...i lied about the wheels

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Is this the Krusty Krab? Yes...? No, you're still Patrick!

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a cancer patient walks into a bar and has a stroke

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what do you call a baby with a stamp on his nose.? Kentucky won the national championship this year

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple, the enslavement of blacks over hundreds of years.

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Why was Hellen Keller a bad driver? She was a woman

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every man comes from between a women's legs for the rest of their lives they try to get back in

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Whats brown and sticky? A stick

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Why did the Cookie Monster go to the Doctor? Because He had an inoperable tumor in his lower intestinal tract.

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Q: What did the cat say to the dog? A: I hate you, alot

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why did the guy cross the road? Because he felt like it

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What is Worst than having a cancer ? Having two cancer

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Yo mama so ugly that she often has trouble being attractive towards people of the opposite gender

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why do you kill people in call of duty you don't you kill computer made figures

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Q: Why did the Honey Badger cross the road? A: Honey Badger don't care!!!

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The doctor woke up and the hooker he screwed told him she had the clap and he said thats the least of your problms bitch you have aids

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KONY 2012! *world rises up cheering in spontaneous patriotism for Africa* Leader of KONY 2012 arrested for public masturbation

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Roses are red,Here's something new ,violets are violets,not ******* blue

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What's long and hard and full of semen? An erect penis at the climax of an orgasm.

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If 1+1=2 why does 2+2 not equal 3?

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How many dead babies fit in a car? Ask Casey Anthony, she'll probably know.

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A man walks into a haunted house and screams. He had arrows on a nail.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops