A bartender walks into a bar. He serves alcohol for a living.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What did the girl say to her ex? Fuck you.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

how does chuck norris eat an apple Just like every other person

thumb_up thumb_down -30

a man walks into a bar, when he leaves he thinks he can hold his liquor and kills a mother and two children attempting to drive home.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Johnny: I saw you long time ago. You were quite the school clown back in the day. Boy I remember back when I was just a whipper snapper we used play around and goof around all day. Whatdya think? Richard: Shut up, motherfuckingbitch

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Why did the chicken cross the road? - To rape you. Knock Knock. Who's there? The Chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What would Walt Disney do if he were alive today? Gurgle and choke inside his cryogenic vault as liquid nitrogen flooded into his lungs.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What was the best part of the holocaust? A: none of it, it was a terrible event in history and hopefully is never repeated

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What did the foreigners do to pass time? They blew up the twin towers.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What happened to the plumber payed in gum? His family left him because he was irresponsible with his business

thumb_up thumb_down -32

So a man is in a car smoking weed when he forgets to crack a window so he over doses and dies. The car crashes and he kills 3 other people.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Q. Why is Obama stupid? A. That's an opinion, therefore i cannot answer that.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Knock,knock Who's there? Apple Apple who? Knock,knock Who's there? Apple Apple who? Knock, knock Who's there? Lemon Lemon who? Lemon know if you want me to say apple again

thumb_up thumb_down -32

How did the little boy with cancer run in his running race??? Very Well....

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Why did the Smartie get fired from the M&M factory? For throwing out all the W&Ws

thumb_up thumb_down -32

How many turrets patients does it take to screw in a light bulb? Cocksucker!!

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Why did the chicken commit suicide? No one knows, he didn't leave a note.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

A man walks into a bar After months of rehab he is giving in to his drinking abuse again and will ruin his life as well as his family

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What do you call a black person flying a plane? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

How does Steven Hawkings refresh after a long day of work? F5

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Q:what do you do when a black guy is drowning A:you dont

thumb_up thumb_down -32

An Asian man walks into a bar and ask the Barman for a beer, the Barman is racist and therefore tells the Asian man to leave his pub. The man goes home and drowns his children in the bath and pushes his wife down the stairs, he is found out by the police and is given a life sentence in jail. 5 years later the Barman kills someone in a bar fight and is also sent to jail for life. The Barman meats the Asian man in prison and they settle there differences with a handshake. Two days later the Barman was stabbed in the neck.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

A man walks into a pizza place and orders a pizza. When he got the pizza, he saw it had pepporonis on it. He liked that, so he ate the pizza.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops