what do you get when you cross a daniel lesiak with nothing?

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you say to a woman with two black eyes? Nothing, you've already taken her police statement and she doesn't want to discuss the incidentit anymore until her lawyer arrives.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A Women is holding a piece of paper with her rights what is she holding a grocery list

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q: If a tree falls in a forest and no one is there to hear it, does it still make a sound? A: Yes

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the chicken cr-VAGINA!!!!!!!!!!! sorry, tourettes.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

what did the 3 year old get for her birthday? nothing she died of terminal cancer at the age of 2

thumb_up thumb_down +2

XD Okay then, just a little and I am not very fond of it, I mean I tried something called tekken but that just made me nauseus. Then I got into some car racing game years ago, RidgeRacer I think, but when I moved the car to the sides, I kinda involuntarily tilted to the sides, and ended up smacking on the ground a couple of times.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q: What's worse than ten babies stapled to one tree? A: One baby stapled to ten trees.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A pair of brothers walked into a bar. It was where the wake was being held from their mother's funeral.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call someone who kills a black man? A murderer

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why was the trash man feeling sad about his life? Because he had a mild case of depression to which his doctor recommended taking antidepressant pills.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

what do you call a blind man who buys a caller i.d.? handicapped

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's Hitler's favorite beverage? Soda! Not Juice (jews) you asshat!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

There are 3 types of people, those that can count and those who can not.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's worse than having embaracing parents? A: they are of the same sex

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How many women does it take to changed a light bulb? 12. 11 to form a committee and 1 to make her boyfriend do it.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

some dude: weed is bad Other dude: then why do they prescribe it to people are you dumb or are you stupid

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Everytime God shuts a door, he opens a window... ...But I am the Goddamn locksmith!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Whats black and white and red all over?? Half a zebra

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What happens when your dog is bad? A crying dog who has to sleep in the BACKYARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Stupid dog....

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A white man applies for a job two weeks later he finds out he lost the job to a hardworking Mexican who went to college and payed his debts

thumb_up thumb_down +2

what would abraham lincoln do if he were alive today? scream and try to open his coffin.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Yo mama's so fat that she needs substantially larger clothes than most other people

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What can never be seen by the owner, looks like Jesses mom, and smeels like shit. Jesses dick.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops