Q: What do you call an underground train full of professors? A: It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

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What do you say when your hot chocolate is to hot? This hot chocolate is too hot.

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Roses are blue, Violets are red, I have to go to the bathroom now...

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Q. The farmer said where's my bucket A. Somewhere

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Q why did the girl scream A she got hit with an axe

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, Everything's grey, I'm a dog.

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Only people of high intelligence can laugh at anti jokes.

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A blonde was very smart, and nobody made fun of her when she sometimes made small mistakes like every other person regardless of hair color.

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What shouldn't you say to a dementia patient? You already said that.

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So Nero, do we tell people your comments are all containing codes and stuff so we can stay in touch?

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— Knock knock. — Who's there? — Funny. — Funny who? — A funny joke.

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Why does Suzie like to wear sunglasses? Because she's blind.

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what is the difference betweeb 69 and 77? 8

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If Irishmen didn't walk out of bars, they would collect and eventually fill the bars of the world and would die given the bars could not support them.

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whats worse than having ants in your pants? getting sotomized by a lightsaber

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the gay guys house Knock Knock Who's there? The chicken

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What's black and at the top of a burning building? A paraplegic

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Why did Johnny fall off of the swing? The swing was defective. Knock, knock. Who's there? Johnny's lawyer.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Joe Bereta is a member of al Qaeda.

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whats funnier than a banana an orange -may bieber

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Your momma is so fat, shes skinny.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first monkey.

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Why did the clown go to jail? He murdered a thirteen-year-old girl.

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What the last thing that went through Osama's mind? A bullet

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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