A baby seal walks into a club.

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In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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Why did the horse escape from his stable? He didn't. He stayed there all night and his owner took him out the next day as the weather was beautiful.

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You wanna see something really scary?

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What's the worst joke ever? Justin Bieber.

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Is it better to be born black or gay? No way to know. That is, unless you are black and gay.

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What do Vladimir Putin and a snake have in common? A central nervous system, to name but one of the many biological similarities.

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whats short blonde and speaks spanish? my spanish teacher Mrs. Inman

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In Soviet Russia, everything you do will have an equal and opposite effect, for the laws of physics still apply in every part of the world. No matter where you are.

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A man walks into a bar and sees a depressed looking giraffe. The man says, “Why the long neck?” The giraffe responds, “That’s not the expression.”

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What is the difference between Steve Jobs and a PC? PC's are not dead.

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knock knock who's there your moms dead im sorry

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autistic kids rock

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roses are red violets are blue me n' friends guna rape you trolololoLOLOLOlololOLLOLOLOLOLLLOLOLOLOLO01010101010111 666

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What does a banana and a helicopter have in common? Neither of them are a police officer.

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Q: Why is the sky green? A: It's not

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Did you see Helen Keller at the movie theater? I didn't either, she's dead.

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Why couldn't the old man see the Moon? Because he was blind and it was daytime.

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a horse walks into a bar. Noticing the potentially dangerous situation everyone leaves, the bartender calls RSPCA who come and retrieve the horse and order is restored.

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WHYS S AFRAID OF B CAUSE OF SBB

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What did George Washington tell his men before they got on their horses? Men get on your horses.

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Girl: What is your phone number? Guy: 1-800-Choke-Dat-Ho

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What happened to the mentaly challenged person is walking down the street? He pooped on the sidewalk and got escorted to his house

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What is Hellen Keller's favorite TV show? She doesn't have one - She is blind and deaf.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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