Why did the chicken cross the road? Neglegence and irresponsibility of a farmer.

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A man is on an operating table. His heart stops beating and he suddenly finds himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter approaches him. "Welcome, my son," St. Peter says. "I will ask you one question, and that will determine whether you can enter Heaven. Did you ever commit a sin and never sought forgiveness?" "No," the man replies, "I always made sure to apologize." St. Peter smiles. "Congratulations, my son. You may enter Heaven!" The man is ecstatic as the pearly gates open up for him. He enters Heaven and is astounded by its magnificent beauty. The man then loses all brain function and dies on the operating table.

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What did the scuba diver say to his partner when he got stuck in some seaweed. Something that sort of sounded like glug, or maybe blub, or some other sound you would hear trying to talk underwater.

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Hey dude. who died.... crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets YO MAMA

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A Black man, a Latino, and a Midget get into a car. They drive to the county fair, get snow cones and ride the tilt-a-whirl.

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Why did the Jew cross the road? After looking both ways many times, repeatedly, to make sure there was absolutely no element of possible danger, he concluded that his best option was the cross the road.

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Knock Knock. Shut up.

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2 boys are going to get candy from the store. What happened? A robbery and they were killed

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OMG did you hear about the man who sky-dived from mars?!!!! No…. Me neither

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What did the orphan get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Why can't Chuck Norris divide by zero? Because it is impossible, the answer is undefined.

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what is the difference between a baby and a book... The book still has a spine

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Carlos was on the computer writing anti-jokes. They all scuked.

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You know that song "FIrework" by Katy Perry? Well, I ate a hotdog last night.

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Why did the skeleton not get invited to the party? because he was dead

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Whats the difference between dinosaurs and skittles? Dinosaurs were killed out hundreds of thousands of years ago when skittles on the other hand are sugery candy that people eat when they are craving a sweet treat

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What happen to the guy who stole the TV. He runs away as he fears the person that stoled his/her TV reports him/her to the police.

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What did the lion say on a hot day in Africa? Nothing, lions can't talk.

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what's worse than getting hit by a car? getting hit by a truck

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What's white and can't climb trees? A fridge

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Who's gay? Justin Beaver

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your friend: i did ur mom you: jokes on u my moms gross friend:.....

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What do you get when you cross a black guy and a keyboard? A black guy punctured by a keyboard

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What do you do when the Cubs win the world series? Turn the xbox off and go to bed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops