- Anti Joke

What did the magician's assistant say after the magician cut her in half?... Nothing. Her spine was severed and she died instantly.

Knock Knock? Who's There? Sgt Constable Ian. Sgt Constable Ian Who? It's Sgt Constable Ian - I'm here to see you about your alleged rape charges.

Eeny meeny miny mo, Catch a tiger by it's toe, If he hollers let him go, Because if you don't he would attack you and go straight for you're neck and you would die a painful death...

What's the difference between a grape and a duck? They're both purple, apart from the duck.

Why did the little and energetic girl fall down? Because I snapped her neck.

What's fat, round and bounces on the ground? A ball. I lied about the fat bit.

How many cops does it take to change a light bulb? None they would just beat the room for being black.

Who ya gonna call? ... Whoever you need to talk to at the current time.

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

How long does it take to acheive a superbowl win? However long it takes you.

My neighbor's kid was running around yelling magical spells. I said "Wow, you really want to be like Harry Potter, don't you?". He said "Yes!". So, I killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

How many electricians does it take to change a lightbulb? No seriously, I don't know because we've only just got electricity in our village.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was standing up.

What should you do if you have a 10 inch penis? Subtly tell the world via an anti-joke

How did the man break his arm raking leaves? He fell out of the tree.

A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Lambos are red Tuxedos are Blue The cat is out of the bag Shit, we're all gonna die in helll

How do you discover a gay snowman? If the carrot is in the ass.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I killed your family, and now i'm coming after you.

Why can't the T-Rex give high fives? Because they are extinct.

Q: What's worse than getting jury duty? A: Getting herpies from a rabbit

What's the cure of cancer? Death.

Apple hates Blackberry.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your BANANA.