if john has 400 cookies and eats 300 what does he have left? diabetes

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because i shot him. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? he was in front of the monkey

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do Hitler and Jesus have in common? Facial hair.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

every knight i see an owl at window

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How come Helen Keller never played professional baseball? Because she was a woman

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q: Why did they laugh at the black guy? A: He told a funny joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call a guy with an axe in his head? Chuck

thumb_up thumb_down +2

If an oak tree falls in the woods, and the tree has 3 squirrel nest in them, then does a whale jizz in the ocean?

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did Billy say to Jesus when he died? Nothing he went to hell. -Austin Conradt

thumb_up thumb_down +2

what is the name of the book that helen keller wrote LADIUFgSLDGFhalkjgfvcgh

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his forehead.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What does it say on the back of Superman`s cape on the "new" movie? My other actor was an awesome dude, all I got now is this asshole... Moral: Christopher Reeve... takes lasers... shotguns, eats lava with his cornflakes... falls of a horse... dies... Moral2: HEY What is the booing for? This is the ANTI JOKE! SECTION... but now to my sincerest thoughts... Moral 3: R.I.P Christohper Reeve, he lived and died with hope... Dying happy while suffering from one of the worst things that can happen to a human being, is an inspiration to us all! True superman!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q. What did the chicken say to the buffalo? A. Nothing, this is an improbable predicament.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How do you make an elephant float? Who cares?

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How do you make a cripple cry Cut of his legs, THEN telll him a joke

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It got hit by a school bus and died.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

knock knock. who's there? doctor. doctor who? doctor: you have cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

why did the man fall off his bike? someone threw an oven at him

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q: why didn't johnny do his homework? A:because johnny is dead

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why was the little boy afraid of the dentist because he was a pedophile

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Roses are red Violets are blue I have herpes And now so do you

thumb_up thumb_down +2

my wifes star sign is cancer, kinda ironic how she died really..... she got eaten by a giant crab.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

why was the boy sad? his bellybutton hurt

thumb_up thumb_down +2

That moment when the worst part of the movie, is when your pregnant wife pees on the couch.....

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops