Her doctor told her that if she didn't start watching her cholesterol she might suffer from heart related illness in the near future.

A blonde walked into a hair salon. She got her hair dyed black, as she is sick and tired of jokes that scrutinize those with blonde hair.

Why does the rabbit go in the hole? because that's where it lives.

What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? He said : "where's my tractor?!"

Why did the boy miss the toilet when he was peeing? Cause he was in the shower.

Two men were walking down the road when one of them spotted an old lamp lying in a ditch. After examining the lamp's handiwork for several seconds one man rubbed the lamp with his shirt sleeve. The men then continued down the road.

Chuck Norris walks in to a bar then many people greet him because of his celebrity status.

whats funny? when isreal special forces hunted down nazis after ww2 and killed the fucks

Whats the difference between the Taliban and a Football Team? I'm not on the football team.

Why did the black man fall down the stairs? Because he was blind

How many people like gang rape? 9 out of 10

- Knock, knock. -- How many dead babies does it take to cross the street and walk into a bar? - That's an odd question to ask to a visitor. -- Your mom.

Llega San Pedro le dice a dios y se va.

Why did the mother stop breastfeeding her son? Because he was twenty five.

What is small, red, and can't fit through a doorway? A baby with a spear through its head. Posted By: Lram

My mom farted, now it smells, ewe. My mom just took of her shirt, BONER! My, friends mom took off her shirt, now he has a boner. We both have boners, and it smells bad. This is weird, me and my friend are very similar, except my mom farted and his mom did not. Now I hate my mom. UN-BONER!

How hot was the blonde considering she was in Africa for the first time and it was 103 degrees, very

Why can't Helen Keller drive Umm, She's dead

(Mortal Kombat Annihilation) Princess Kitana: "Mother, you're alive" Sindel: "Too bad you, will die" (Troll 2) "They're eating her. And then they're gonna me. Oh my gawwwwwwwwd." (The Room) Johnny: I did not hit her, it's not true! It's bullshitt! I did not hit her! [throws water bottle] Johnny: I did *not*. Oh hi, Mark. Mark: Oh, hey Johnny, what's up?

What do you call a black woman working at a bar? A Bartender. What do you call an asian woman working at a bar? A Bartender.

Q: What's green, red, and covered in cookie crumbs? A: A dead girl scout.

Roses are Red, Violets are Red, Everything is Red, I have a retinal hemorrhage

There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns hoping that at least one of the puns would win. Unfortunately, none of them did.

I would piss if alex berry had aids n died

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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