roses are red violets are blue i have AIDS i'm about to die

Why does Michael J. Fox make the best milkshakes? Because he uses the best ingredients.

How do you get out of a car with only a baseball bat and a hammer? Unlock the door.

Why couldn't Danny learn the alphabet? Because a man of forty was staring at him in a very peculiar way and Danny found it very difficult to concentrate.

Fred: Hey man where were you last night. Steve: Why don't yo ask yo mama.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? This joke.

which is faster a) ferrari b) beetle a ferrari

What do you call a lubia chin jew slave? Kia

What do you do when the Cubs win the world series? Turn the xbox off and go to bed.

What do the Chinese call "Ping Pong"? Ping Pong

your face is kinda funny

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

roses are red violets are blue i have Downs Syndrome... and a ding-dong potato

Where did Wendy decide to work for her part time job? TACO BELL

A door walks up with a knob what does the guy do? he opens the door

I'm a vegan thats why I am still a Virgin.

Why did the jews get off the bus? Because i threw a fridge at it

What do you call a moose with a 42 gauge shotgun pellet through its head? Open Season

What do you call a cat that gets pushed into the pool? Angry as hell.

How did the little boy fall over? He was tripped up by his alcoholic father.

A redhead walks into a bar. The bartender asks him if he wants a drink. He says yes.

Did you hear the joke about the deaf kid? He didn't either.

what did the poor guy get for christmas POVERTY

Inspirational speaker: "You can judge a man by the way he treats those who can do nothing for him." Me: "Hitler loved dogs."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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