Once upon a time, there was a ghost. The ghost was sneaking up on a little girl when she turned around and asked the ghost "Are you a stalker or something?" The ghost, unable to reply (being a ghost) was then kicked in the shins. The End!

Two chemists walk into a bar. The first one says "I'll have some H20." The second one says "why did you come to the bar if you're just going to have water?" and orders a beer.

A banker makes some poor economic investments with other people's money. turns out the people can never get the money back. the banker walks away like nothing happened. the government does nothing to prosecute the man. Somewhere in there his wife leaves him.

Knock knock Who's there? Boo AHHH A GHOST D:

A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

Oh s***

I'm sorry but your child seems to have fractured his spinal column and can no longer control any part of his body below his neck.

What did the black father get his child for Christmas? A Yo-Yo. Actually, never-mind, he doesn't know his father.

why did the owner of Google decide to name the company "Google"? google it..

What smells like old people and is white? Talcum Powder.

I'd rather kill myself than commit suicide.

Your momma's so stupid she stuck a power cable up her ass. Shortly after she died

salad days!

No, but I am not just an author, the important thing is, that this kid has been stopped as we speak, as I said he was selling information to several clients on the deep web, and patterns do reveal that he was selling you out piece by piece while prepared to make a run for it once he delivered the vital details. Say, did you promote this guy a bit too fast or something? Either he knows as much as you do, or otherwise he has been learning the ins and outs of your little place pretty fast.

what is the difference between two trees? it doesn't matter because motorcycles don't have doors

Knock, knock Who's there? It's me Me who? Just open your damn door funny guy it's freezing out here

What's worse than a dog peeing on your new flower garden? A terrorist attack.

Why did the man cross the road? Because he couldn't get his dick out of the chicken

Want to hear an anti-joke? Yes. Well I'm not going to tell you one.

Why is Ellen Degeneres gay? Because she likes the same sex

Q: What do you call a dog with no legs? A: Immobile.

What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A Pilot

If my wife has got 6 oranges in one hand and 6 apples in the other hand, what has she got? No chance of stopping an uppercut.

How do you get a black man out of a tree? Tell him he won the current game of hide n seek.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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