Q: What do you call 10 babies at the bottom of the ocean? A: Dead

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A man and a bird are on the edge of a cliff. The man falls off and dies and the bird flies away because birds can fly and people can't.

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A man looks both ways before crossing the street. He gets hit by an airplane.

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Whats worse that having cold soup? Cancer

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one time, there was this anti-joke.com joke set-up. It was just like a normal joke set-up. was the anti-joke punchline effective, artful of funny at all? no. it was a plain statement of some facts without consideration for humor. it gets old after you read like 50 of them. it gets REALLY. F*CKIN. OLD.

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Can a rabbit jump higher than a tree? Trees can't jump

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Hickory Dickory Dock, Three mice ran up the clock, the clock struck 1, and the other 2 escaped with minor injuries

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Two clarinets were locked in a case for 20 years. They both play well.

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How did the lazy fat boy burn a lot of calories? He set his fat friend of fire.

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There is a mom a dad and a son, they walk into the museum and the dad is in the bathroom.

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Knock Knock Who's there? My foot. My foot who? My foot in your ass.

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Q: How many Babies does it take to paint a garage? A: babies do not have good motor skills therefore, they can not hold a paint brush.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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What is my cats favorite college? Harvard

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Why did Emily fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Emily.

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I'm rubber and you're glue, neither one of us say anything because inanimate objects can't talk.

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1657 is a cool number, when a leprachaun sings it sounds like pie drinking an obese penguin (do you know what I mean....) :D

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What is the similarity between Moses and Muhammad? They both have the same letter starting their names

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What did the prostitute say to the president of the United States? Good morning Mr. President. She had managed to leave the sex industry, finished her education and was doing secretarial work in the White House.

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What did the Chinese man say to the Japanese man Nothing as they have never met

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Knock knock Who's there? Fuk Fuk who?

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What do you get when you mix monster, coke, and and seltzer? Kicked out of stop and shop.

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Why did the blonde tattoo her zip code on her stomach? She wanted a tattoo.

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what types of people have big noses? people whose parents both carried the recesive gene.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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