It's not just a boulder. It's a rock! A rooooocckk!

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why did Lucy fall down? she got hit with a hammer

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what is red white and blue? the french flag

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A woman takes a shortcut through a dark alley. She is raped, robbed, and murdered. Her family mourns her death.

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why did the chicken eat chicken noodle soup? Because he killed his brother.

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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Why did the girl drop her cookie? She had no arms.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, who had his car stolen and wasn't very happy so called the police.

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Why didn't Jesus like Pizza? Because Pizza doesn't exist.

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Why was the clown sad? Because he was found guilty of raping and murdering 33 young men, and sentenced to death for 12 of those murders by a jury of his piers.

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Roses are black, Violets are too. I'm colourblind. Stop laughing.

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21

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Why did the little boy fall down the steps? Because he wasn't a very stable person.

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Why couldn't the melons get married? As gay cantaloupes, their jurisdiction didn't allow for same-sex marriage.

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How can you tell if your wife is dead? She won't have a pulse.

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What's worse than dropping you're ice cream? Getting your face mauled off by a German Shepard.

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why can't dead peaple have sex? because they're dead.

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Why Did The Horse Cross The Road? He Couldn't Because He Was Still-born

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come back from camp.

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a man walks into a bar and buys a drink

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How many women does it take to ski across the pit of lava? None, they would burn and die.

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Mike lost his arms in a car accident. Knock knock Who's there? Not Mike.

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What do you get when you cross a Pigeon with a Mailbox? A Carrier Pigeon, they are extinct now.

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A wife says to her husband "Everybody's coming over tonight, I want you to dress nice." *logically this cannot happen because there is no way that this couples residence can fit all 6 or so billion people in the world, nor would they want to.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops