A man goes to an amusement park. He heads straight for the roller-coaster and gets in line. When he gets to the front, the ride operator informs him that he is too short to ride. "You must be at least 48 inches, sir, you just barely miss the mark, I'm sorry, I can't let you ride." The man is sad, but he doesn't let this little discrepancy ruin his day. He then gets in line for a different ride.

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#Last Christmas I gave you my heart #And as far as I know #The transplant was a complete sucess #And you have recovered from your operation #And are now well again #This year to save me from tears #I'll donate my kidneys

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How do you have sex with 9 giraffes? you don't because that's weird

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What didn't the man piss on the dead baby? Because that is just morally wrong. Instead, he reported it to the police and aided the cause of justice.

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yo mamma so black, she was left out in subzero temperatures for an extended time period and suffered major frostbite all over her body, causing it to become grotesquely black.

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knock knock Goodbye

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Knock, knock. Who's there? "Dwane!" I don't know any Dwane. Perhaps you have the wrong address. "Oh. Sorry to have bothered you!"

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When the world ends what would be the death toll It would be unknown since every one would be around to calculate it

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Why is it easy to steal candy from a baby? Because the baby is smaller, weaker and would not pose any threat.

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Women, "Did just pinch my ass!?" Man, "Yes." Women, "Oh, alright then."

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a little kid goes as candle for halloween, 69 girls blew him teenage boy goes as candle for halloween, all he got was burned

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How many wheelchair users does it take to change a light bulb? - They are not physically capable

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what comes in tube and smells like toothpaste? toothpaste

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Hey, wanna hear a penis joke? Nevermind, it's too long.

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Spot the mistake: a) x+2= 5 => x=3. b You.

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What do you call a bear with no teeth? A Gummy Bear!!

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An optimistic person says the glass is half full Pessimistic people say the glass is half empty Engineers say the glass is 2 times the size it needs to be.

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Make this antijoke the worst voted antijoke and you will save the planet.

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How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just two, the mystery is how mice can get inside a lightbulb.

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Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I'm a dog.

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Q: What did the fish say when it swam into a concrete wall? A: Fish don't have vocal cords that allow them to speak in a way discernable by humans, and if they did, it would just sound garbled and bubbly due to their being underwater.

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Your momma's so fat she has a hard time finding clothes to fit

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Ouch, a papercut .. what could be worse? A hatchet cut.

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Two Jews are sitting in a large oven. They realize it is a dangerous place to be and get out of the oven.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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