Why'd the chicken cross the road? Its babies were being mauled by a cat.

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What's black an white and red all over? Two dead babies, one African American and one Caucasian split in half by a chainsaw.

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Why was the man so angry? Because the woman was not in the kitchen

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What's funnier than shooting a moose? The realization that the moose was Sarah Jessica Parker...

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What do call a man with a daranged wife? Married

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Angus is so Scottish he wears a kilt when it is socially appropriate.

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Whats worse than the holocaust? Sex with helen keller.

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There were once three brothers who were traveling along a lonely, winding road at twilight. In time, the brothers reached a river too deep to wade through and too dangerous to swim across. However, these brothers were learned in the magical arts, and so they simply waved their wands and made a bridge appear across the treacherous water. They were halfway across it when they found their path blocked by a hooded figure. This hooded figure then proceeded to step out of the shadows and mug them, all three of them were brutally murdered. This is why you stay away from hooded figures when you are being talked about in a story being told in third person.

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why did the owner of Google decide to name the company "Google"? google it..

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Knock Knock. who's there? James. well use the doorbell.

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What did George Washington say to his men before crossing the Delaware River? "Men, we're crossing the Delaware River."

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What's sad about Justin bieber getting thrown off of a cliff Nothing

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What starts with F and ends in UCK? Firetruck. What starts with P and ends in ORN? Popcorn. What starts with S and ends in HIT? Shit.

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What makes the turtle move? It's legs.

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what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? alot of things, worms don't taste that bad.

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Black people.

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Why was Sally sad? She was the only survivor of a plane crash that killed her entire family.

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"Why did Suzie fall off the swing?" "She had no arms." "What did Suzie get for Christmas?" "Cancer." "What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a tub of dead babies?" "I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage." "What did Suzie get for Christmas from me?" "My tub of dead babies."

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MOTHER OF GOD!! What is this horse doing in here?!

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What is the opposite of Obama? Mitt Romney because he his white and a republican so all is good with him.

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Why was the little boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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What's red and green and goes 500 mph? A frog in a blender.

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Q: Why did the little boy drop his toy? A: He fell and broke his wrist, then dropped it in the emergency room, due to the broken wrist.

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Roses are red, Violets are dead, I climbed through your window, I'm under your bed

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops