What did Timmy want for Christmas? Parents.

In Soviet Russia, it is usually cold throughout the year, as it is located in a colder region of the planet.

I'm a wise old man, so I'm aloud to touch you in the bathing suit area.

What's grey and can't fly? A castle

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven brutally raped and murder six's parents whilst six hid in the closet and watched.

A Russian man walks out of a bar looking very sober because he walked out of the bar sober.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was a woman

What is smarter than a blind Mexican midget of average intelligence? A genius

What was the women doing out of the kitchen? Watching the movie 'Birth of a Nation' at her father's house

What did Johnny get for Christmas? Nothing. Johnny is Jewish.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? However many needed.

So a woman took her drivers test today Since she passed, and tomorrow is her 16th birthday, tomorrow she will have the legal privlage to get her license.

What's more likely to happen in 2011 than the rapture? Finding my real parents.

why did the chicken cross the road? I never got to ask it got hit by a car.

Whats the difference between KFC and Starbucks? KFC didn't murder your sister.

How do you make Yoda sad? Kill all of his friends.

I took a shower yesterday. You have no idea how hard it was sneaking that thing out of Home Depot.

I'm Polish.

why did Susay fall of the swing? Cause she had no arms

How do you confuse a blonde? Explain the concept of time travel.

yo mama is so old, so old that she was given senior citizen discount at the restaurant.

what's worse than a pile of dead babies? a pile of dead babies with a live one at the bottom eating its way out.

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

Roses are red, violetsvare blue, I have aids, so do you

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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