Santa and a smart blonde jump of a cliff. Who gets to the ground first? Neither, they don't exist.

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Why did I post a joke on this website? Because I felt like it.

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I was going to type an anti-joke but I totally forgot how it starts. It goes something like something something something something something your mom's a whore.

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Why couldn't the man walk? He lost his legs when he stepped on a land mine in Afghanistan.

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why did the girl cross the road? to get away from you

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every time I stay in the water too long my pp gets all shriverly sometimes can't find it omg that's so weird

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What happens when a drunk driver meets a stoned driver? A head on collision

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why are anti jokes so funny? cuz u pobably just laughed at this one.

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WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS ROAD?!!! cause he was silly

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You know you have no friends when you steal someone's ALIAS concept and disrespect what is perhaps the most intellectually satisfying form of humour. [L]

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Q: If you're driving down the street in your canoe and the wheels fall of, how many pancakes does it take to shingle your dog's garage? A: 27, because bananas have no bones.

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Why did the german killed the jew? Because he was nazi.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to take three harpoons to the chest and still manage to feast on a family of baby seals...... Hi my name is Joey

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DON’T HIT KIDS!!! NO, SERIOUSLY, THEY HAVE GUNS NOW. Via: Pingzic collection of Funny WhatsApp Status

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How do you make a baby stop crying? You slit it's throat.

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WHAT DYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE MEAN YE DON'T KNOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW?

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whats the difference between blue and green? there different colours.

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How do you tell if a politician is lying? You make him take a polygraph test.

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Who stole the cookie from the cookie jar? Actually it's my cookie jar, and my cookies. I stole nothing.

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Nerve endings. Now, lets say we make that sensation of a finger down there vibrate, as your nose (not not your lower parts no no) become twenty times as sensitive, now you are just rubbing your nose right? Try not rubbing it completely off now...

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If Alex Maitland reads this he is gay

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Q: what did humoure say to lie A: u must be tellin a lie

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Light travels faster than sound, thats why people look smart until they talk.

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What do trees and people have in common? If you hit them enough times with an axe they will fall over.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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