Why was Barack Obama wearing a Justin Bieber T-Shirt and slapping you with a pitchfork? Because you didn't listen to me when I told you to stop doing shrooms

Wanna hear a joke? Ruddell had sex.

What do you call a latino with a limp? John...his name is John

Why did the chicken cross the road? What chicken?

Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog.

How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

What is brown and sticky? A stick

Chuck Norris gets punched in the face.

A man walks into a bar. Itwas an metal bar so the man was hurt.

What's long, dark, and smelly? The unemployment line.

WHY ARE WOMEN SO HARD TO SLEEP WITH? Because the men are always hard while sleeping with them

Two bars walk into a guy, and the bartender says, "You're telling the joke wrong, stupid!"

Why does Tim Tebow kneel and pray after there's a positive outcome of the previous play? No, seriously, why does he do that?

What's worse than a bag of dead babies? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Jews.

Knock Knock -Who's there? No one -Ok

What happens to a fish with no fin on the right side? It repeatedly swims in a circle.

How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Eight, because there's one tickle per tentacle!

True or fales? Eddie Izzard.

A black guy and a Mexican are in a car, who is driving? They take turns due to the fact it is a long trip.

What do you call a black man and an Asian working in a field? You politely ask their names and then use them; their colour is of no consequence.

A man walks into a bar. He is knocked unconscious, and passers-by rush to his aid.

yo mammas so fat when she runs the world spins faster

How old is victor? Half past dead

My ex wife looks like a pitbull.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...