How many elephants can you fit in a mini? None. There are no affordable cars large enough to fit a fully grown elephant.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Turns out he was needed immediately at a business meeting.

How to make a plummer cry Kill his family

What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm drunk, I want Taco Bell.

Knock knock. Whos there Time to get a watch

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot you racist!

Roses are blue, Violets are purple, I like chicken. Do you like chicken?

How does a woman scare a gynecologist? By pulling human entrails out of her purse when he asks her to provide insurance.

Man: Did it hurt? Woman: huh? Man: Did it hurt when i killed your family?

Q; How does a priest perform an exorcism? A: He doesn't.

What do you call a person with no arms or legs? I don't know, that's why I asked you.

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says why suck a long face the horse shits on the floor and walks out

What do you call an African man with no legs? Murderer

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

What does a casino have in common with a woman liqur in the front, and poker in the back

Why did Sally fall off her bike? Because sally has no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally.

Carlos was attempting to write anti-jokes. He sucks at writing anti-jokes.

What's easier than taking candy from a baby? Almost nothing.

Where does Hemech take a shit? The toilet's ass

How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

Situation: 2 cows eating grass on a warm Sunday night. Question: Why does 9+4=3 1/2? Answer: 69!

What's worse than getting arrested? getting arrested on your birthday.

What did Kony say to the children right before he took them Come with me you f******* n*****

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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