When life gives you lemons Unless it gives you sugar, water, and a cup your lemonade will suck

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i knew this one arab, who was so arab that there was nothing funny about him

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Bigfoot, the loch ness monster, and self-respecting Justin Beiber fans are all the same, your told they exist, it's not true.

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was gonna write a really funny "anti-joke" about two dogs and some spagetti but decided instead to tell you about how hard my life is and how much i hate getting up in the morning and just keep you wondering about the spaggetti and the dogs while i kill myself and it all a sudden makes sense as the two dogs are eating my shattered brain that looks like spaggetti wich leaves me wondering , am i spelling spaggetti right?

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Whats the difference of a pile of dead babys and a lambrogini? One of them is not inside of my garage.

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Nigel Farrage and the concept of UKIP.

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Roses are red, Violets are brown, F*** who's had a shit in my garden.

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Kid One: "Hey, you! Do you know how to spell "I CUP'?" Kid Two: " Sure, F-A-G....G-O-T..." Kid One: ".........."

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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what is the difference between Rick Perry and Lindsay Lohan? it only takes Lindsay 4 1/2 hours to finish a sentance.

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How many babies can you fit in an oven? Depends how hungry you are.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bar asks "Why the long face?". The horse replies " I am deeply troubled by the anthropomorphic aspects of my existence and the extent to which I am now protected by law."

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Why did the kid fall off his bike? His mum threw a fridge at him.

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? Were both lawyers.

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What did the mexican say to the black person? Hey there! How are you today?

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- Knock, knock. - Who's there? - Immigration.

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What did the black guy say to the white guy running off the cliff? Watch out! You're running off a cliff!

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What's the difference between a picnic table and a Mexican? A picnic table can support a family of four.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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what is this joke about? - i don't know i am still writing the j

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There once was a man from Nantucket, who had his car stolen and wasn't very happy so called the police.

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What do you call someone who's father is black (born in Kenya), mother is white (born in Canada), and was himself born in Australia? Someone with tri-citizenship

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An artist walks into a bar and orders a rum and ckoe. The bartender reads the first sentence and realizes the artist is dyslexic and fixes him a rum and coke.

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Why did the girl drop her cookie? She had no arms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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