What do you call a blind person? Mack Despard

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If you add two 1's together its 11 if you add two 2's together its 22 If you add two 3's together its 33 So what happens if you add 4 and 4? No you dumb-ass its not 44, its 8

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage?

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Why was the kid late for his dentist appointment? He was abducted and he's been missing for thirteen days

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Being the worm.

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roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, which is a serious mental disorder in which I have difficulty properly experiencing reality. It should not be confused with multiple personality disorder, which is a completely different disease with different symptoms.

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Opinions are like assholes. I'm not sure how they are alike, but that seems to be the general consensus.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I told him to. I'm very influential.

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What did the french toast say to the french fry? I don't know, I don't speak french.

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What do you call a poor man on the side of the rode asking for money? A poor man on the side of the rode asking for money.

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Why doesn't the little boy talk to his mom? Because she smells like barbecue sauce.

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven raped sixes mom

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eh dylan quieres que te trolle de nuevo

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what did the man say to the sad woman? go make ma a sammich before i hit you again! the women refused and was hit again.

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don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!

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Knock knock Who's there? Mike Mike who? Mike Davis from across the street. Come in.

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Why did the TV not turn off? You need to use a remote.

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how do you get a clown to fall off a swing? hit him with an ax

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Q: What did the ant say to the bush? A: Ernest Borgnine

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven killed all of six's family

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The girl was really drunk and passed out. She woke up the next day with a hangover.

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Q: Whats different about pizza and jewish people? A: Pizzas don't scream in the oven.

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Aodhans da is Mr.Bradly and he dosnt know what coordinates are, 180 anti-clockwise,he has "the key to examination success is revision and homestudy tattooed on his chest, his das herbert the pervert, his mas a taxcollector and on the dole, his da sits on the roof eating biscuits, cleaning the satilite dish, he gets his pubes shaved in gordans chemist, he uses mcdonaldsd wifi, hes a fruit fly and he can stop global warming by shaking his head!!!!!!!!

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What do a fish and an eagle have in common? They both live underwater aside from the eagle.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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