when life gives you lemons you make lemonade when life gives you a homisidle brige you clearly have done something to make life angery

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What happens when you throw a red rock into a blue ocean. The rock gets wet.

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Q: How many nuns does it take to eat a dead racoon? A: 2

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(Mortal Kombat Annihilation) Princess Kitana: "Mother, you're alive" Sindel: "Too bad you, will die" (Troll 2) "They're eating her. And then they're gonna me. Oh my gawwwwwwwwd." (The Room) Johnny: I did not hit her, it's not true! It's bullshitt! I did not hit her! [throws water bottle] Johnny: I did *not*. Oh hi, Mark. Mark: Oh, hey Johnny, what's up?

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Whats better than seeing a worm in your apple... Reading the the next anti-joke.

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What does the redhead miss most at a party? Her father. He was in a car accident when she was young.

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What did the chair say when someone sat on it? Nothing. The person's butt covered the chair's mouth.

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Did you hear phonsi was Gay? I just found out too, he walked into the diner and said, "ive got AAIIIIIDS."

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What's worse than a dead baby? A dumpster full of dead babies What's worse than that? One is still alive at the bottom What's worse than that? It had to eat its way out. What's worse than that? It came back for seconds

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Q. What did little John get from reading this. then wait and you will see that the person who you were asking the question will give you a series of awkward faces until they lose interest

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Johnny had 100 chocolate bars. He ate 95 and gave 3 to his friend. What does Johnny have now? Diabetes

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A man walks in to a bar, remembering he was actually going to the hardware store, he heads out and leave.

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Why did the little boy didn't finish his dinner? He died.

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Who is a pussy? Jeff Misner

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I once walked into my grandmas house to find her laying face down on the ground. It turns out that everyone was planking but grandma wasn't breathing...

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What does the average fishermen catch Fish

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Five little monkeys jumping on the bed One fell off and bumped his head Mama called the doctor an the doctor said, "I am calling Child Protection Services."

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How do you stop an ice cream headache? Run in front of a bus.

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What's worse than a pimple? Finding out it's a botfly.

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Person 1 - Have you heard about the movie about constipation? Person 2 - No. Person 1 - It hasn't come out yet

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A white man walks into an elementary school. He was the teacher.

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What happened when the Mexican put the Popsicles in the fridge? They melted

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Why did the little boy fall down the steps? Because he wasn't a very stable person.

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What fires shots? A gun

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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