Bob: Oh, there was a big surfing competition in Hawaii. Bill: that's really cool. Bob: yeah, there were huge waves up to 53 feet. Bill: Awesome! Bob: Yeah there was a Japanese guy that won. Bill: Wow, that will bring up the spirits of japan. Bob: Yeah, but he got disqualified. Bill: No, how?!?! Bob: he was surfing on his dresser.

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What do you call an asian plumber? A plumber.

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There once was a man from Duluth who's never did rhyme. They were often too short.

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roses are red violets are blue bullets are lead now i shoot you

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i dont care if you rate me or not

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Knock knock. Who's there? Never mind that. I have a gun and your child. Come out with all your valuables and he won't get hurt.

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Roses Are Blue I Have A Gun And Ill Sout You!

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Which is the smallest? A. Jupiter B. Whale C. Cow D. Bracelet Answer: D

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How do you make a hormone? Modify bacteria using recombinant DNA technology.

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A black guy and a Hispanic guy are in a car together. Who's driving? The black guy.

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How many alzheimers patients does it take to screw in a light bulb? To get to the other side

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People always say if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say Anthony at all. Mimes must be full of hate.

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During english, we started talking about Attention Deficit Disorder when... OOOOOOOOOHHHHHH SHINY... wait what were we talking about

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What did Stephen Hawking say to the prostitute? A several garbled and mostly inaudible comment that she could not understand.

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what did the boy in the blue hat do? wear his blue hat

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Why did the woman drown in the bathtub? Her husband was holding her under.

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A duck walks into a bar and says, "Put it on my bill"

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says why the long face? The horse says my mom died from cancer

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A man ate a lot of ice cream he had double bypass surgery 3 months later

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?"i'm so turned on right now." - horny light bulb

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why is ginger kid so sad? Because his all family was killed

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Q: What's the meaning of life? A: A bush, have you ever been dragged through one? It hurts.

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Why did the blonde fall off the cliff? She was blind and deaf so she never knew where to go, and her parents kicked her out for her problems. It is a sad situation that noone wants to go through

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Why couldn't the grandma remember what she did last night? Because she has Alzeihmers and grandmas don't do anything.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops