What do you get when you cross a spider with a cow? A dead spider.

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Why did the boy stay in the closet? Because the door was locked.

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I cried because I had no shoes until I met a man with no feet... ...then I made fun of him and laughed.

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A man walks into a bar and sits down. The bartender then lights him on fire.

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Why did Jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Certainly not Jimmy.

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could switching to Geico save you 15% or more on car insurence? Does a bear shit in the woods?

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Who would be an amazing GOP VP? Chris Christie -Mitt Romney

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What's red and green And moves at 300mph A frog in a blender

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Three people walk into a bar. Eight people follow them. They all go back to Bob's house, except Anna, Jimmy, and Joe. TImes the amount of people going to Bob's house by four. Thats how many people get arrested at the end of the night. How many people aren't arrested? Do you even know why you read this? Get a life and go to an actual bar, a party and get arrested.

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Who pushed joe off the building? Nobody. joe hated his life and wanted to die

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what can jump higher than a tree? anything that can jump because everyone knows that trees cannot jump.

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THIS ONE TIME MY DOG ATE A WHOLE CHEESECAKE

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What do you do to become a hairdresser? Set Off the fire alarm

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Why did the white girl lose the race? The girl that she was beating was black and her boy shot her. Therefore the black girl won.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them.

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don't just stand there

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vitamin c

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? It's dependent on many factors, like the size of the babies and the tub. It would be a horrific endeavor, and you should probably stop thinking about such things.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't

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Two men walk into a bar. The third one ducks, as he saw the first two men previously walking into it, and it looks like it rather hurt.

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Why was the girl called stupid? She is mentally retarded...

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Whats worse than a joke? This

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What did the math teacher get after he ate and he ate? A full stomach.

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What's fat and round and has a ballsack nose? Mr Chicken

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops