The day after Christmas a chain-smoker, a sex addict, and an alcoholic go to the doctor. The doctor tells the three friends that they need to quit their addiction or they will die. R.I.P. Tommy, Jacob, and Winston 1/1/2011

Why was Jimi's mom sad? Because Jimi suddenly fell to the floor clenching his neck while saying "I'm Dying!"

Q: Whats A Schoolbus Full Of Black Children??? A: A Rotten Banana!!!

I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

What's worse...a thousand dead babies in one joke...or one dead baby in a thousand jokes?

Why was the homosexual sad? Because his parents kicked him out, it was illegal for him to be married, and he had a difficult time being accepted by the society into which he was born.

Have you ever tried Ethiopian food? No. Neither have they.

In the North people say "once upon a time." What do people in the South say? "Y'all never gonna believe dis shit!"

what do you call a brown man that has been repeatedly shanked and has been fucked up the arse by 10 Rag heads in one night and thrown in a well to slowly and painfully die? Lloyd.

Jersey Shore.

Your Mom is so fat she's Fat

Rishi has popcorn while wass n jess r making jokes on anti jokes

What's the difference between a duck? They are mostly the same, only one leg is shorter.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have schizophrenia And so do I..

Why was the old man climbing the flag pole? Because he had Alzheimer, and he was losing his grasp of reality.

Roses are red Violets are blue Btw I have aids And now you too

why are anti-jokes so funny? they aren't. they're stupid.

What did the confused blonde girl ask to a nearby student? Nothing. She isn't supposed to chat because it's study hall and they enforce a strict "no talking" policy.

Why are black people so dark? They originated from Africa

Two arabs fly into a bar in the twin towers

What do you call a moose with a 12 gauge shotgun bullet through it's head? Open Season

Why did the black man enjoy KFC. Because like many foods, it contains monosodium glutamate (MSG) a flavor enhancer that makes many foods taste better. It however had nothing to do with race or cultural background.

Why did Billy fall over? Because someone tripped him.

What's long and hard and full of semen? An erect penis at the climax of an orgasm.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...