A horse walked into a bar. The bartender asked: "Why the long face?" The horse said: "My wife just died."

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What did the teenage girl text her friend while driving? It doesn't matter, she's dead now. Don't text and drive.

A seal walks into a club.

A drunk guy walks into a car

What did the duck say when it saw a puddle? Nothing.Ducks are uncapable of speaking human speech.

What did the man say to the cat? Nothing. He doesn't have a cat.

What comes after 7? Pedophiles.

What did one hand say to the other? Nothing, you fool, hands don't talk.

what is black and white and red all over? a group of people of mixed races playing paintball.

Stevie Wonders said to his friend, "Have you seen my house?" "No" "Neither have I"

Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven killed off his entire family.

What really killed Adolf Hitler? The gas bill

why did katy fall off her bike?

A quadriplegic walked into a bar, and... oh, whoops, nevermind.

There was once a boy who ate fire. He died of severe burns.

knock knock! who's there? me.(walks away...)

Daughter: Dad I have some news for you Dad: What is it? Daughter: I am pregnant Dad: ... I am so happy I am going to have a grandson, my 27 year old daughter just married and now pregnant, this is a great day!

How did the chicken get to the other side? He crossed the road.

A black man and a white man were on an island. They lived in England.

the NAACP

Why couldn't Roger become an astronaut? Because Roger's a toaster.

why was the boy sad? because his mom just punched his hamburger

How do you steal from a sushi buffet? You say please.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...