Why is McDonalds bad for you? Because their is so much fat in all its products, and contains many calories.

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A king's son's birthday was coming up and the king asked,"Son i'm the king. You can have anything you want." And the son said,"Oh i'll have some purple ping pong balls." For his birthday he got a rollar coster, a pizzaria, a new car, and of corse, some purple ping pong balls. The next year the king asked,"Son, i'm the king, you can have anything you want." and the son said,"Oh i'll have some purple ping pong balls." And for his birthday he got a manchin, an iphone, a water park, and of corse some purple ping pong balls. One day, the prince was driving in his car and was in a terrible car accadent. On his death bed, his father asked him one final question,"Son, why did you want all of those purple ping pong balls?" And the son answered,"Well, i wanted all of them because-" and then he died.

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Why was the Japanese man unable to see? Because it was extremely sunny outside and he had forgotten to wear sunglasses.

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a man walks into a bar and was arrested because it wasn't a bar it was a bank and he shot and killed 4 people during the armed robbery

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I told my two lesbian friends I wanted to join them. I am a priest in a Gay Marriage friendly state and they are happily married.

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person: Ask me if i'm a tree other person: are you a tree? person: no

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What do you call a black guy holding a crate of watermelons? a farmer

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If i knew people where coming i would have trimed my antlers

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What do u call a man who sells hot dogs on the street? A Mexican

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Q: What do you call a Polish astronomer? A: Copernicus.

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What do you call a Pakistani flying a plane. 9/11

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Q: If 0+0=2 and four shampoo bottles is equal to two toaster strudels, how many pizza slices can Samuel eat? A: Winter because grass=6

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Knock-Knock. Who's there? Cow that recognizes normal social cues and politely waits for its turn to speak. Cow that recognizes normal social cues and politely waits for its turn to speak who? Moo.

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Why is Andrew sleeping? Because he took and overdose on sleeping pills, he probably died in his sleep.

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An albino and a jew walk in to a bar. They both order the same drink and chat for a few minutes before the albino must get home to his wife. The jew leaves shortly after, tipping the bar tender a generous amount for his superb service.

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How do you pick up girls in Auschwitz? With a dustpan

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What do you get when you rape a dead baby filled with jalapeños? A lifetime in prison, and a burning penis.

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stephen hawking walks into a bar...

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Why do dragons shoot fire? I don't know, I'm asking you the question.

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why is six afraid of seven? because seven is black

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roses are red violets are blue i take pleasure in the simple things in life as i have nothing else left to live for

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why cant the porcupine marry the balloon? ...neither one can talk.. obviously.

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What's worst then finding an worm in your apple. Finding a colony of flesh eating bugs after you toke a bite.

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Knock Knock Who's There Al Qaeda

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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