Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin looks at the other and says: "Man it's hot in here!" The other muffin looks over and says "Holy cow a talking muffin!"

What do you do when life gives you lemons? Kindly reject the offer and give it back to life.

What used to be red, but isn't anymore? A scalped ginger.

Q: If 0+0=2 and four shampoo bottles is equal to two toaster strudels, how many pizza slices can Samuel eat? A: Winter because grass=6

Why did Jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Certainly not Jimmy.

Annld so the penguin said, "This is my most casual outfit!"

Why was the black guy sad? Because he has a knife through his throat

Roses are red Violets are blue I hate rhyming Penis

Why couldn't Billy write his own name... ...because he was wearing purple lemonade???

Knock Knock Who's There Al Qaeda

My mum is called Steve

Whats worse than getting a splinter? Taking a shower at penn state

how do you know if a fish is gay? you ask it

James got up from the couch, forgetting what he got up for he asked his girlfriend, Mary: "What did I get up for again?" Mary replied "To get your medicine for your amnesia."

q.how do u kill a jew? a.you glue a penny to the bottom of a pool

Whats better then having 10 fingers Having 11

Why did Billy fall off the slide? Someone threw a refridgerator at his face.

A panda walks into a bar, orders some bamboo shoots, and bamboo leaves, and eats them

my wife out of the kitchen

Q: Why is Rosie odonell fat? A: Because you are sexual attracted to small children.

your mamas so fat she tried to hang herself but the rope broke.

What did the little asian boy get for his birthday? To work for minimun wage making high quality shoes for greedy white people in North America who dont care about anybody but themselves.

What's the cure of cancer? Death.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didnt, it was hit by a car

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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