If you are reading this you will soon suffer a slow and painful blow job... -_-

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Why does Eric Clapton use a Mac? Because he prefers Macs.

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How many Alzheimer patients does it take to make the bed? How many Alzheimer patients does it take to make the bed? How many Alzheimer patients does it take to make the bed? How ma......

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Why do black people like chicken? Because it's tasty, nutritious and easy to cook.

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If life hands you lemons you're probably hallucinating

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand and says to the man running the stand. QUACK!!!

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*The doctor walks in* Knock knock. Whos there? Doctor. Doctor Who?

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Dyslexia ruels!

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. And that's when I found out my Uncle Ted was a cross-dresser.

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This is an anti- joke

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NO ONE LIKES YOU!!!!

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Q:How do u kill a butcher A: Kill its family

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what's funnier than a dead baby? a lot of less tragic things

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I am Jack Bauer, Where is the nuke?

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A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I'll serve You, but don't start anything."

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A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

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What is long, hard, and full of seamen A submarine you pervert

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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what is another way to say tree? A big stick with leaves

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Terry's penis oh wait! what penis But I'm not a rapper

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how did the little black boy cross the river? he walked over the bridge.

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Whats on my leg? A pimple. What is it doing? Releasing a white/clear puss.

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A boy called Justin bieber fell down a hole and died

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What's the only animal that has to be oiled? any animal I can think of

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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