How do you fit 10 babies in a bowl? With a blender. How do you get them out of the bowl? You don't, you've already been arrested for multiple cases of infanticide.

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Hey Eduardo Luis Torres Guerrero 36 years old of age formerly living somewhere in Washington DC (ill get an update on what the name of this place is) and the only Pedophile (in the world?) Somehow with three fucking last names. I do not like you "Edward Lewis Richardson" (yeah thats the name we know him the best by people, this is fraud in addition to everything else), you got the cops to raid my home, you got me in handcuffs because you started the rumors that I was injecting cocaine, into my stomach... Which makes as much sense as... Nothing. I am out now, asshole, its Insulin, but you know that already, since you stole my insulin pens apparently in order to inspect them (they are not even needles technically) from my office and threw them away probably since they both say insulin, and proceeded to spread rumors. (we got footage you know) Did I mention that our private detective which is gathering information regarding you as we are about to sue you (do not worry about your wife, she is divorcing you after I told her that you personally told our private detective while piss drunk that you have 11 STD`s (hell I never even heard of that many) all of them contagious, it was my moral obligation among other things. As said we are filing a case against you. Also, the work laptop on your office is not your property, and neither are the files on them (work policy) and while you have an astounding collection of pornography, they found some illegal porn including minors. Needless to say, your request for a promotion is denied, you are fired, our policy allows us to withdraw your Christmas bonus (leaving you in the negative sum, they want your car back for repossession. We are suing you while you rot in jail, your life sucks, and as soon as our detective finds out more about you, I am going to post this wherever I want for all of my staff and your family to see. And you should know how much our staff loves gossip, most of our male staff are pissed at you and want you dead and worse, this "worse" is a thing prison inmates will do to guys like you once you get there. (Sorry colleagues, employees and etc, this is all the info we got for now... Well he sells marijuana, uses cocaine (what do you know!?) is a member of an active ring of men that engage in sexual activity with male animals, his rolex is faker than his "brand new" Audi which is clearly a model from 2001, because it looks like shit and clearly states 2001 several places. And yeah staff members, I know much of this is hard to believe... Or is it? I can add more (I WILL add more) he owes money to the Russian mafia. Thats it for now, the police has not found him yet Consider this my payback Edward Lewis, I asked the cops if It was okay for me to post this, after saying "oh we know where he is, but I would not say it is morally right for you to post his personal information". Then I started typing this. This information is not personal, its what we wound on our laptop in what was your office, its what your wife is telling me as I help her move to... I wont say, its only right. And no you monster, its not at her mothers again. You know what? The information his computer alone gives us, just gets sicker and sicker, In case you are wondering who I am I am your lead attorney and supervisor, I know a thing or two about the law, and believe me, I am not the one breaking it when I share this Eduardo... (sicker as a large order of non humanoid shaped dildos, pictures of... I dont want to make out what that is... Anyways the laptop is taken into police custody as we speak, and the police will continue searching every single computer, so move away from the screen, anyone found deleting stuff will probably be associated with Eduardo, so if you have you know been watching porn or whatever, leave it be its against the rules but after this its nothing. Anyway, I am about to throw up now so I am off. Okay everyone get back to work I need to go throw up.

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Tom: Hey Fred. Do you wanna hear a joke? Fred: Sure Tom! (long pause) (10 Minutes Later) Fred: Tom, I thought you were gonna tell me a joke? Tom: I did, the joke is that there is no joke.

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Wait, I am sleepy as the world which spawned you Nero, but which comment is mine again?

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68

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What is the different on a black guy and a bicycle ? The black guy steals the bicycle, but the bicycle dont steal the black guy. Yes, my bike got stolen ...

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why does the pie have apples in it? it was apple pie.

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Why did Billy fall off the slide? Someone threw a refridgerator at his face.

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Roses are red, violets are blue. my Mom is a hooker.

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Why did the editor lose his job at a poetry magazine? Because he's worthless.

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Do you know what happens to a toad when it's struck by lightning? The same thing that happens to everything else.

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whats big and white and falls from the sky\ Refrigerator

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What is similar between the Holocaust and soccer? They both suck.

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what's worse than 24? 6 million.

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What do you call a quadriplegic person in the water? One should refer to them by their name, but seeing as a quadriplegic person would be incapable of swimming if you do see a quadriplegic person in a body of water you should seek help or call emergency services.

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If life hands you melons you might be dyslexic

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Why couldn't Helen Keller read? Tree sap.

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My mind is like full of holes so I cannot remember where I am anymore, and I am tired in addition, but say, what the hell is a tussle? Sounds cute, but what is that?

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Why didn't the lolipop taste like anything to the boy beacuse he was aborted

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When life hands you lemons you can't make lemonade, Sugar and Water are two other key ingredients that were not included with the lemons.

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Why was the anti-joke poster offended by all of the thumbs down? Because he didn't understand the concept of an anti-joke and instead submitted a childish, racist, incoherent lame 'joke'. This filled him with angst because he is uneducated and doesn't respond well to criticism.

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What do 2 arabs say to each other in a super-market? For those of you who don't know your history, the true Lebanese are Phonecians. As such, they are not Ishmaelites/Arabs. They are from the house of Jaffeth. the youngest of Noah's sons. Arabs are from the house of Shem (i.e., Shemites/Semites), the oldest of Noah's sons, and Hamm, Noah's middle son who fathered Cannah with his mother. Haggar, the woman with whom Abraham fathered Ishmael, was a Cannonite. As such, Ishmael, the father of the Arabs, is half Semetic and half Hammetic. The true Lebanese are neither. Furthermore, the first non-Jewish Christian church was established with the Gentiles (the children of Jaffeth) in Lebanon. And then the shop blew up.

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Why did the gorilla have big nostrils? Because it was a trait passed on to him from his biological father.

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What has four legs in the morning, two legs at noon, and three legs at night? An experimental animal mutilated then exposed to radiation.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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