what leaves a bigger memory than a passionate kiss? A STAB WOUND!

Roses are red, violets are blue, you are my slave, get back to work!

What's the hardest part about watching a 2 year old get hit by a bus is? Trying not to laugh.

This one time, at band camp, I played the trumpet.

how do you upset an obese cat? you put her in dog sweaters

Why is a cat in the desert like Christmas? Because Egypt is a country of deserts, the Egyptians had cats and Jesus, Mary and Joseph escaped to Egypt in the Christmas story before Herod carried out his massacre in Bethlehem on baby boys of under two years old.

Romney: I think you would raise our debt and make more Americans jobless. Obama: It's just cuz I'm black!

Have you seen Stevie Wonders house? No Ok

How many Bedouins do you need to change a light bulb? 2, one is changing the bulb and the second is powering the generator.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because that's where the oncologist's office is.

derp

Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Getting raped by a giant elephant.

What do the angels say when god sneezes? Chuck bless you

What did the man say to the jew? How are jew?

If life hands you lemons you're probably hallucinating

What 10 inches long and wont be getting sucked this valentines day? Whitney Houstons crack pipe

What do you call a low-fat banana? A nothing...

What is both bold and brash? Fox

Knock Knock Who's there? a tree

whos a sick fuck? jake morris

Why is evan a lil poop? cause he pooped my poop all the pooping ;)

Q: Why did the Asian man get fired from his job? A: He sexually assaulted his co-workers

A guy walks into a bar. He goes to the hospital with a severe head injury and dies.

a sausage maker buys a box of cereal

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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