Pete and Repeat were sitting in a boat. Pete fell off. I hope he was wearing a personal flotation device.

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how many babies does it take o paint a house depends on how hard you throw them

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What did the ocean say to the shore? Nothing, water and sand are incapable of speech. Unless of course you are Harry Potter in which case you can cast a spell on them and turn them into a cat which still couldn't talk and them from there you could wait for them to evolve which doesn't actually exist so you would have to ask God and then you would wait for a few years than they could say hi.

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Q. Whats the diffrence between a squirl and a chipmunk? A. A squirl has a squirl mom and a squirl dad while a chipmunk has a chipmunk mom and a chipmunk dad.

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Why did Steve Jobs step down as CEO of Apple? Because he died.

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whats black with purple?nothing no animals or humans have anything like that

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whats fat, green and hairy? Nothing I would pleasure myself to.

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car Get in the car

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What did one pig say to the other pig while sitting in the bathtub? No thanks I already have a typewriter.

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Roses are red, ill give you a wink, two in the pink, and one in the stink.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Nothing, he died.

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Knock knock... Knock knock... Knock knock... Unfortunately, nobody was home to sign for Marks parcel.

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Your Mom

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what's worse than getting cancer.........nothing cancer is a pretty bad thing

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~Roses Are Red~ ~Violets Are Blue~ ~I Am Straight~ ~Not Sure About You~ ~Tell us?~

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Funeral... You can't spell it without FUN

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I put the STD in stud now all i need is U

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I was relaxing on the beach today when a fat bird came over and said, "Would you rub this lotion into my back please?" "I'm afraid I'm only here for the day," I replied.

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What's yellow, black, and makes you laugh? A bus full of black people going off a cliff.

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Doctor, I keep believing I am stuck in the Matrix! Oh thats common, you know existencial crisis and so on but we got medications, you want the blue or the red pill?

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How do you get a black man down from a tree? If the man cannot climb down himself, perhaps call the fire department.

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Why did the plane crash? A loaf of bread was the pilot

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You're Mom is Dead She was killed by a Grammer Nazi for me misspelling Your

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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