What had 82 eyes, 7 mouths, and sings the blues? Nothing, the described creature does not exist.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A gay man watches football.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Last night I had a lovely chicken burger I had no mayo left so had to make do with coleslaw but enjoyed it anyway.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A fish swims into a bar The town is flooded and thousands are dead

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A horse walks into a bar, it broke both its legs and was then put down.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why wad six afraid of seven? Because seven was a sexual offender.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: Why did the boy have a bloody nose? A: Because a serial killer split his head in half with an axe.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

there was a black man n a white man they went into a hauted house the black man saw a penut butter slice n tryed to eat it then the ghost said dont eat the penut butter slice so the black man ran away so then the white man came and saw the penut butter slice the white man toke a bite then the ghots said i told u once i told you 2 i wipe my ass with that penut butter slice

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Have you ever heard of a goose?

thumb_up thumb_down -2

The kid next door was running around shouting spells and carrying a wand. ''I bet you'd love to be like Harry Potter!'' I told him. ''Yes!'' he exclaimed. So I killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the chicken cross the road? The grass is always greener on the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do you make an anti-joke offensive? Add racism to it.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

why did the blond get and abortion? because she was forcefully raped by her 42 year old boy friend and felt she could not raise a child on her own.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Women's rights.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

'knock knock' 'Who's there?" "the mailman, Ive got mail for you"

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Man goes to the doctors, says doctor, im depressed. ive tried everything but i just cant see the bright side of life anymore, it seems empty to me, like theres no point in existing. The doctor certifies the man as clinically depressed and alerts the relevant authorities.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did Aladin say to Mulan? Nothing. Although they are both Disney characters, they never appear in the same film, and therefore never communicate.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

what did one ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, They just waved.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A blind man, a black man and a rabbi walk into a bar. The blind man trips and falls violently.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Once there was an ugly barnacle. He was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do a black man and a cop have in common? They are both not cabbages.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the girl fall out of the swing? She had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How many blondes does it take to skrew in a lightbulb? Usually just one.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do you make a unicorn? Jab a stick through a pink horse and name it Liam

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops