Did you know Helen Keller had a swingset? Neither did she.

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How do you tickle a tree? you dont you are a schizo stop kicking leaves

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Why dose my mom have a penis? She is a man

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What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A Pilot.

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What brown and sticky? A sticky turd

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Whats long, black, and fat? The line at KFC

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what is worse than losing your phone? having it destroyed because you were texting while driving causing an accident and you are not eligible for and upgrade for another two months.

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two muffins are in an oven and one turns to the other and says,'' hey, it sure is hot in here''. and the other one says," holy crap, its a talking muffin!''

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What's your star sign? Cancer. Oh you're gonna die. AWKWARD.

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Why was the teenage girl bleeding from her vagina? Because I had shot her in her vagina with my gun earlier that day.

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What do you get if you mix rice with slightly different flavoured rice? Rice.

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why did kim kardashian get divorced? because she was unhappy with her marrige. and because shes a slut

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who is not good looking? mon morello

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How do you get a blonde's attention? Throw deodorant at her until she looks.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who let the chickens out?!

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Why was Martin Luther King shot? The shooter strongly disagreed with his viewpoints.

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whaT DID HEVEN SAY TO THE FRIDGE hAVE YOU GOT A COLD

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What do you call a blue horse with two legs and five eyes? A blue horse with two legs and five eyes.

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How many Terry Pratchetts does it take to change a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

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How much does a dead baby weight? the same amount when it was alive!

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The once was a little girl named Suzy who liked swings; the only trouble was that she had no arms. In order to avoid having any jokes written (and recycled thousands of times) about this fact, she decided to run a sponsored marathon in order to pay for prosthetic arms. Suzy swung happily for the rest of her days. [L]

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A man with no legs walks into a bar. Just kidding...

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Roses are red Violets are red Jimmy is red Sally is red Susie is red Jimmy is red Billy is red Carl is red Jose is red Jerry is red Ferdinand is red Everyone is red Because they all just got shot In the head And now they're dead

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Q. What's the difference between a duck? A. One of it's legs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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