What do you call cheese that isnt yours? Stolen cheese.

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Do you know what Stevie Wonder's house looks like? No. Well, neither does he.

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Q: When you have alot of hair, what are you? A: Obease

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Roses are red Violets are blue one plus one Equals two

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Cody went to the store. Big Floppy Donkey Dick.

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once opon a time. never mind i'm just going to beat you kids.

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Why is the Asian 2nd grader sad? Her best friend was diagnosed with breast cancer. She has 3 weeks to live.

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Why did the black man buy a watermelon? Because they're not free.

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Dont read this joke

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What do you get when you cross a bungie cord and an owl? My ass :)

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Two penguins, sitting in a bath tub. One says, "Pass the soap!" The other says, "What do you think I am?! A clock?"

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What's short, ruthless, and asian? Kim Jong Ill

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Yo mama so fat you have to grease the door frame and hold a twinkie on the other side just to get her through.

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why did the kitten not eat its food? because its face was stapled to the floor.

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Here's a riddle... A cowboy rides into town on saturday, stays for three days, and leaves on saturday... How does he do it? Well, you see he is a time bending magician who usually lives on a farm on Mars with his family of magicians. He is not really a cowboy but dresses like one to be like everyone else. He is heavily affected by peer pressure and has done a lot of dumb things just to impress his partners. His partners are big bullies and they have trouble being nice to Jimmy (The time-bending, space-living, cowboy-impersonating martian). His partners names are Bob and George. Oh right... I'm trailing off... Well, you see he is a time bending magician who usually lives on a farm on Mars with his family of magicians. He is not really a cowboy but dresses like one to be like everyone else. He is heavily affected by peer pressure and has done a lot of dumb things just to impress his partners. His partners are big bullies and they have trouble being nice to Jimmy (The time-bending, space-living, cowboy-impersonating martian). His partners names are Bob and George. Oh right... I'm trailing off... Well, you see he is a time bending magician who usually lives on a farm on Mars with his family of magicians. He is not really a cowboy but dresses like one to be like everyone else. He is heavily affected by peer pressure and has done a lot of dumb things just to impress his partners. His partners are big bullies and they have trouble being nice to Jimmy (The time-bending, space-living, cowboy-impersonating martian). His partners names are Bob and George. Oh right... I'm trailing off... OH... I'M DONE NOW...

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What is the longest sentence that a man knows? If it is used it in context, isn't round and the speaker attempts to quote the whole number - or at least all of it known to date, then any sentence involving the value of pi.

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HOLY COW!

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what did the judge say to the lawyer during a trial. He said We are all in a court. thus concluding that the judge was retarted.

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You know what sucks ? A vacuum.

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Who's dumb and retarted. A person that is dumb and retarted.

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What do you call a spider with no legs? A spider.

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Q:When a T- Rex walks into your house what does it mean? A: Your on pot, T-rex's are extinct

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Your mother's breasts sag so low that the late great impressionist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks.

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How did the black guy get out of prison? Further evidence in the case was found which proved that the black guy was actually donating blood to a local blood drive for children with leukemia.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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