Roses are crimson. Violets are purple. I don't understand why this poem is so popular.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? Nothing he died.

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Why was the kid running around? He was on fire

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Why did the tortoise cross the road? To get to the other side.

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the game

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? He had no arms.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, FUCK, MY GARDEN IS ON FIRE!

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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How many plumbers does it take to unscrew a lightbulb? Plumbers don't do that. Electricians do.

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1-1 was a race horse, 1-2 was one too, 1-1 won one once and 1-2 won one too

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Why did the girl scream? She was being raped.

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Whats worse than a worm in your apple? A worm in your asshole.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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What do you say to somebody that wont shut up Shut up!!!!

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Why'd Sally fall of the swing? Sally's a fish.

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What's red and can't find a family? A fire hydrant

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What's the richest fish in the sea? The one you threw a quarter at.

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I have an erection My mom!

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What do you call a fat guy running on the street? Nothing because you should respect his effort trying to improve his health.

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knock knock! who's there? me.(walks away...)

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chuck norris does not know how to use a plunger.

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Guy 1: Why did Captain Hook die? Guy 2: Because he wiped his anus with a hook? Guy 1: No, because everyone dies.

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How many dead kids can you fit into a plastic bag in your trunk? Ask Kasey Anthony

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What has 3 eyes, green fur and blue ears? Nothing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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