Wanna know how to confuse a blonde? No. I wanna know which way you would prefer to die.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was hit by a fridge. Why did Sally fall off her bike? She was hit by a falling monkey and fridge.

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What do you call an Arab driving a Plane? A Pilot.

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How do you know when you have had too much to drink? When you ran over 7 pedestrians and are lying in the back of a police vehicle

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Three Jews get on a train to Stockholm. How many get off at Stockholm. None. The train went straight to Auschwitz.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no hands. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not sally.

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how many dead guys does it take to screw in a light bulb? 6

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Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? Cus he was dead. Why'd the other monkey fall out of the tree? Cus he was stapled to the dead monkey!

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When life throws you lemons, your first instinct is to make lemonade. Due to your severe lemon allergy, however, you will die within several minutes and therefore have no viable method of creating said lemonade. You die horribly and your death sparks a movement against the biological warfare of life.

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a boy poops in class everybody laughs and now he has no friends

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Q: How do you make Kobie Bryant cry? A: Kill his family.

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A paraplegic wheels himself into a bar. The barman asks, 'What can I get you?' 'Nothing,' replies the paraplegic, 'I've just pissed myself and I need you to help me clean myself up.'

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Why wasn't my friend laughing at my jokes? Because his grandpa is dying.

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What do you call a black man playing golf? A golfer.

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What's the diffrents between a horse and a zebra? WELL clearly there names duh.

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Why didnt Stevie Wonder wave back at the white man? Because he's a racist.

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Your mom is so ignorant that she in completely unaware how the premature termination of QE2 in conjunction with a potential US credit downgrade could substantially impact her fixed income portfolios and hinder her ability to retire in the desired time frame.

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Women's rights.

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Why did the Triceratops walk into a grocery store? To buy groceries

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Why was the black guy being talked to by several policemen? Because he was advertising a new renting deal on an apartment downtown and the two policemen were openly gay and have a right to live together.

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knock knock who's there? THE ROCKET POWERED FIST!!

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Dimes are silver Pennies are brass Why does your face look like an a**

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did you know r kelly and jay z had a album together?

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What did the girl with two broken legs give her parents for Christmas? Medical bills.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops