How do you make a cripple cry Cut of his legs, THEN telll him a joke

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the drunk homeless man get for his birthday? Liver cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's worse than being a Jew in the Holocaust? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Knock, Knock Whos there? Banana Banana Who? Banana i didn't say your moms dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

whats the difference between the same pair of shoes? one shoe is for the left an one if for the right

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How do you make seven an even number? You don't, it's impossible.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

whats purple, extinct, and smells like children? barney

thumb_up thumb_down +1

roses are grey violets are grey im a dog

thumb_up thumb_down +1

An old man walks into a bar. He suffered greater injury than a younger man due to his advanced age and deteriorating health. But he did eventually recover by strictly adhering to his doctor's advice of bed rest, improved diet, and increased, yet moderate, aerobic exercise.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

whats worse than 911 nothing you cant beat 911that sucked

thumb_up thumb_down +1

THE GAME

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How did the Nazis torture someone? They inserted a glass tube in the penis and flicked the end so that it shattered.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: why did the boy fall down when he was walking home? A: he was murdered.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A man with a magic watch says to a prostitute, "My magic watch says you are wearing any underwear." "YOU HAVE MAGIC WATCH?! Can it tell time too??!!!"

thumb_up thumb_down +1

me and joey are going to watch the football game, at this point you relize you shouldn't hang out with joey and the other guy because it is joey and I not me and joey

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why do people go on this site? They have no friends and no lives.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Ask me if I'm an orange. Are you an orange? No.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Joe: Hey, why are your counters all red and your blender looks broken? Me: The same reason why Mrs. Johnson's baby is missing. ajl

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you get when you mix 5 bottles of beer, a bottle of vodka, 3 glasses of red wine, and 15 jello shots? Alcohol poisoning.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How many omish people did it take to screw in a lightbulb.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Your in Thailand on a Elephant ride... at the end you jump off but uncle jack is still on the elephant and the elephant wont let him off.... Do you help your uncle, Jack off the elephant?

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Did you hear about the Dislexic Devil worshipers? They sold their soul to Santa.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops